Bulletstorm – The Review

Bulletstorm LogoPerhaps I’m jaded or perhaps I’m negative but with all the hype surrounding Bulletstorm I never bought into it. It was a little too talked up. I thought to myself “It’s all marketing. It is not possible for this game to live up to what everyone is saying about it. No kidding, the people that make the game think it’s great.” Then the demo was released so I thought I would give it a shot and I downloaded it. I played it once, I deleted it, and I moved on. Bulletstorm was absolutely all hype.

Ishi from Bulletstorm

"Don't let my patchwork exterior I'm really quite the singer."

Finally the release day came and I got my copy of Bulletstorm. While I waited in the morning and early afternoon for my copy to arrive I checked what others had to say and it was doing well. Very very well. So well that I started to feel a small twinge of excitement for its arrival. When I started playing I realized that my initial assessment was spot on. Bulletstorm did not meet the hype. It took the hype kicked it with a shining golden boot and then proceeded to dance on it while singing a jaunty tune. It so flat out beat all of the hype about it that the hype is currently in critical condition and Bulletstorm faces a lengthy sentence for “effing awesome FPS”. Odds are that it is not remorseful and will not get time off for good behavior.

Bulletstorm – Controls

The controls for Bulletstorm are about as tight as tight could be. There is nothing that feels out of place, nothing that feels like it needed to be tweaked. Bulletstorm came out of the gate kickin’ for the balls and landed solid blows each and every time. The controls are precise, common sense, and make the game wonderfully fun to play. Whether you are using the leash to bring a person in, kicking them onto a cactus, or adjusting the flight path of your bullet from a sniper rifle, Bulletstorm’s controls leave nothing to be desired.

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Bulletstorm’s controls get a 5 out of 5.

Bulletstorm – Gameplay

Bulletstorm Gag Reflex Skillshot

THIS is how you play Bulletstorm

There are two ways to play Bulletstorm, the right way and the wrong way. If you play it the wrong way you will hate it. You will find it tedious and boring on all levels. When you play it the right way then you will see why Bulletstorm is outstanding. The game isn’t built on the premise of run, shoot, run, shoot, run, shoot some more, duck, cover, shoot, repeat. This breaks the formula for first person shooters with use of their Skillshots. The more Skillshots you perform, the more points you rack up. The more points you rack up, the more upgrades you get.

But you can’t keep using the same one over and over. You have to unlock them for higher point values. You have to use them smartly because if you chain them together you get more points. More points, more upgrades, more fun. Bulletstorm is not a video game where you can merely run into a room and clear it and move on. You have to quickly evaluate the situation and move swiftly to find the best way to clear the area. While some of the enemies might be somewhat formulaic in how you take them down, the game itself never is.

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Bulletsorm’s Gameplay gets  a 5 out of 5

Bulletstorm – Graphics

In a word, gorgeous. Every level has clearly been designed to provide as much beauty or filth as possible. This is an overrun vacation resort planet you are on, after all. It should damn well better be picturesque. Bulletstorm does this perfectly. From the scenic views, to the cityscapes, to the flowing rivers, to the absolutely gorgeous way that the water sprays up Bulletstorm delivers in every possible way.

But the views aren’t all there is. The characters and weapons are exquisitely thought out and designed as well. When you wrap someone up with a flail you can see them struggle to get free. If you aim for the arms or legs you can see the damage being inflicted on the arms or the legs. When you overload your weapon it glows a very angry hot glow and as you watch it cool down you watch the weapon slowly work itself down from its fury.

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Bulletstorm’s graphics get a 5 out of 5

Bulletstorm – Story

The story takes a break from the “space marine’ trend and puts you in the boots of a space pirate who was formerly a space marine. The reasons for this are something you will have to discover for you own. The story for Bulletstorm could very easily have been its downfall. However they didn’t leave the story in its own world breaking from the action to explain to you why you are doing what you are doing. They fully integrated it into the gameplay itself. When you’re in a firefight you can hear the interactions of all the characters. The people you surround yourself with engage one another while you’re working your way through the world in a way that is both downright hysterical and believable.

It’s these interaction that really help keep you motivated, interested, and ultimately laughing your ass off with the colorful expletives and outstandingly crude metaphors.

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Bulletstorm’s Story gets a 5 out of 5

Bulletstorm – Overall

The scores don’t lie. Bulletstorm isn’t your run of the mill first person shooter. It so surpasses everything that’s been done before we just have to shoot the wad on it. Bulletstorm gets a 5 out of 5 for not only being absolutely mind blowingly amazing but for also restoring our faith in hype.

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Rating: 4.0/5 (4 votes cast)


Posted On
Mar 24, 2011
Posted By

Okay, I have finally played this game. Well, mostly. I haven’t quite finished it yet (I’m on the last chapter, I think), so shhhhhhhh.

I have to admit, the dialogue is a guilty pleasure for me. A filthy, dick-riddled, sarcasm-intensive guilty pleasure. I know the game has gotten some razzing in the media for it, but I wouldn’t change a word of it. Listening to Spike Spiegel and Commander Shepherd trade verbal abuse and dick jokes for hours had me rolling off the couch laughing. I am a major closet potty-mouth.

My only real issue with the game is the boss battles. I don’t know how the gameplay could be so awesome in general and then just grind to an annoying halt for bosses. I don’t recall a single boss battle that didn’t piss me off…fortunately the game was so addictive I soldiered through simply because quitting and missing out on the rest of the game is NOT an option.

Really, though, the game had already paid for itself partway through the first chapter, and I’ll tell you why: Waggleton. P. Tallylicker. Bulletstorm, thank you for that whole section of the game. I nearly cried from the awesomeness.

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